TO ALL MEN AND HUSBANDS

Power is good. Our ego is fantastic. I have mine too. My beautiful damsel knows that too well. All men need it to lead a home and not to control. It takes a man who has ego to properly take care of his lady/wife. He will always want to foot the bill and go the extra mile for his damsel. So, show me a man whose lady lacks confidence of herself, then I will point to you a man who has failed in ego management. Power without control, equals a disaster. That is why that transformer is stationed at the corner of your street. We are the head no doubt. No body questions that. Anyone who wants to challenge that will have to raise litigation against God. But, uneasiness lies on the head that wears the crown. And the crown on the head of a king is not for fashion parade, but for responsibility. So, at times, I will rather have you a follower.

And He that must lead must first follow (Mathew 20:26). That
is the leadership you are expected to exercise on that lady. Being the head of the family is for service and nothing more. You must learn to die for her. That was the leadership quality of Adam in the garden. The Bible says it was Eve that was deceived and not Adam (I Timothy 2;14) . Yet, Adam collected the fruit from her so that he could bear the pain with her. That is the real ego of a man. That is taking responsibility. But at times, we allow this ego of a thing to dislocate us and we lose our place in destiny. Any man who cannot put his ego in the right perspective does not deserve a yes from a lady. Ego is for service and not to dominate.

My point is this. Do not present yourself as a “superman” before your lady/wife. A superman does not exist anywhere. The last one I saw was in a movie. We only have a Super God. And that is the Lord Almighty. Some of us are growing spiritually, mentally, socially, academically etc but never allow our ladies/wives to grow along with us. We feel if they do, we will not be able to control them. Who is asking you to control her? God did not give you that assignment. That is witchcraft. You are called to serve and that is what makes you a leader. Or may be because some of us have not really seen someone we truly love. The day you find one, you will suddenly become a baby. I am talking from experience. All this GIRAGIRA will come down naturally. Some of us have security problem. We will never allow them to grow and develop as we are. We just want to dominate at all times. That is not leadership.

We allow every decision in the house to be strictly built around us. So that, when ever we Are not around, the woman cannot make an urgent decision that will improve the welfare of the family in our absence. When daddy is not at home, everything stands still. This is a wrong side of ego in men. We kill their sense of dignity and confidence. Everything is around daddy. She has been limited to a 3-FOLD MINISTRIES at home ( Cooking, Raising kids and Sex). She cannot do more than that because of our ego and we just want to dominate at all times. It is only a failure that is always conscious of dominion. Go and dominate animals and situations around you and not your lady/wife.
You are expected to train and love her. Let her grow and develop along with you.

Enroll her in seminars, conferences, programs, let her improve in her education, let her build her career etc. Let her make decisions at home and you do the final endorsement. Let her make mistakes and you do the corrections. They also have talents and skills that can be developed. So, let her express herself too. That is when she will even respect you the more. Stop playing the “Mr know it all” “you are not a super man”. We don’t know it all. You cannot always be there. Doing this will aid her carriage, experience, and improve her confidence. THAT IS WHO I CALL A MAN. Glory to God. Thanks. Have a great day.

Tunde Adenuga